Jordan hasn't been getting any supplements and it's because he is still having spasms. They just won't go away. Some days they are worse than others. Some days I barely see any, and I think they are about to go away, but then a few days later they come back. Not as severe as the day we went the ER, but enough to make me not want to start back up on the medications yet. And he's in desperate need of them. His outbursts are getting louder and his behavior is a tad out of control. It's nothing I can't handle. But it seems to just get worse day by day. I want to start implementing the supplements because it doesn't seem as if they are the reason the spasms get worse. Sometimes I wonder if it's a certain food he reacts to. I've still been giving him plenty of Gatorade's. I want to believe it's a completely different problem now. Even though the symptoms got better when I started hydrating him, I just think the dehydration has caused another problem that keeping him filled with fluids can't fix.
Since he is having such outbursts Jordan will be staying home with me for the remainder of the week. Yesterday morning the bus drivers says he is acting erratic on the bus and sometimes playing around too much when it is time to unload. Also a note was sent home that he is loud in class and has to be talked to consistently about it. All this comes from not getting his supplements because of these darn spasms. I actually implemented the inositol that morning because of what I see around the home that shows me I shouldn't prolong this any further. But because of the outburst at school and on the bus I have just decided to keep him here so I can get two of the supplements, inositol and gaba, worked into his system so when he returns his behaviors will be better. Also yesterday I made a call to his doctor. I planned to make the call long before the bus driver and teacher spoke with me about his actions. Hopefully she can guide me to something else that we can do since the magnesium cream and the Epsom salt baths haven't done much to make the spasms subside any. After doing this for almost 3 weeks and over a week straight I would think if it was going to work, I would have seen some improvement by now. It's time to figure out what else this can be and move on from what isn't working. I'm not as worried about it because I know he will be okay. One thing about my busy week was learning about faith and restoration at my church's women's conference. It was 3 days of something like an intense therapy session. I learned that I have to truly believe that Jordan will be healed. And one way of believing it, is acting as if he is. So even though the spasms are still present, they aren't affecting me as they were before because they aren't going to last always. So I am praising Him now because soon they will be gone.
Because of this and other things, this has been a consuming couple of weeks. I have been at church functions 6 out of 7 days last week. I was happy to learn about my restoration and all God has in store for me. It was very interesting, but ever since, I have been going through some serious spiritual warfare. Even others that are in my family are being attacked. Three out of those 7 days at church I was attending the women's conference about our restoration. It covered various aspects of life like playing the victim, being restored in your faith in Him, and even sex. I was a wonderful few days and I learned a lot. However, because of the information, the devil is hard at work to make me take my mind off of what I learned. He wasted no time which lets me know I am right on time to get back what he stole, which includes what I lost in my son. It's not where I'm seeing the most difficulty, but it's up there. I took my daughter with me to the teens and tweens part and she is going through it as well. He is truly after my family, but never will I give him such victory. The thing that stops some from moving forward is that when they hear restoration what they envision is usually very different from what they actually see, and they get deterred; give up. Being restored is a process that can be an easy one, but more than likely a hard one, and it will take time. Most times it will look worse before it looks better, and that is a trick of the enemy. To make you think that it's not going to happen. I can easily just say Jordan is not getting any better, he is actually worse now (the spasms), and just give up. But I know his schemes.
1 John 4:4 goes, "You are of God, little children, and you have overcome them, because He who is in you is greater that he who is in the world." God is greater than any hardships that come my way so I have no doubt that I have a plot against me from the devil, but God will see me through because of my faith. I...we are still in the process of being restored.
 |
| First Baptist Church of Glenarden |
So when I asked Jordan if he wanted to stay home with me, he said no. Then I asked him if he wanted to go to school, he said no. He loves going outside so I asked him if he wanted to, he said no. So I asked him if he wanted to go see Dr. K, he said no. Last thing I asked him, did he want to go to church? He said church, yes. I took him to bible study with me and Kaiyah last night. When it was over and we were walking to the car, since I thought now that he's been to church the want is out of his system, I asked him did he want to stay home with me tomorrow? Again he said no. We went though all the questions again and when I said do you want to go to church he pointed back at the church and said church yes. I told my husband and did it in front of him as well. But this time I didn't ask him did he want to go to church. I said well where do you want to go, he said church and walked away. I have been praying with him, praying for him (salvation), and listening to sermons in the car. Church is the only place he wants to be. Not home with mommy, not even outside playing, but church. I am delighted because before last night he had only been 3 times. The last was the respite care that he may associate with it. And that's okay with me. He actually got to learn about Noah and the ark last night. So even though he didn't get to do the things he got to do at the respite care, he still wants to attend. God calls and speak to our little ones and we have to be the leader and bring them to Him. He is doing it with my son. He is answering my prayers.
Because of this and other things, this has been a consuming couple of weeks. I have been at church functions 6 out of 7 days last week. I was happy to learn about my restoration and all God has in store for me. It was very interesting, but ever since, I have been going through some serious spiritual warfare. Even others that are in my family are being attacked. Three out of those 7 days at church I was attending the women's conference about our restoration. It covered various aspects of life like playing the victim, being restored in your faith in Him, and even sex. I was a wonderful few days and I learned a lot. However, because of the information, the devil is hard at work to make me take my mind off of what I learned. He wasted no time which lets me know I am right on time to get back what he stole, which includes what I lost in my son. It's not where I'm seeing the most difficulty, but it's up there. I took my daughter with me to the teens and tweens part and she is going through it as well. He is truly after my family, but never will I give him such victory. The thing that stops some from moving forward is that when they hear restoration what they envision is usually very different from what they actually see, and they get deterred; give up. Being restored is a process that can be an easy one, but more than likely a hard one, and it will take time. Most times it will look worse before it looks better, and that is a trick of the enemy. To make you think that it's not going to happen. I can easily just say Jordan is not getting any better, he is actually worse now (the spasms), and just give up. But I know his schemes. 1 John 4:4 goes, "You are of God, little children, and you have overcome them, because He who is in you is greater that he who is in the world." God is greater than any hardships that come my way so I have no doubt that I have a plot against me from the devil, but God will see me through because of my faith. I...we are still in the process of being restored.
