Have I lost my voice?

Again it has been over a month since I have written. And not just in my blog, but I haven't attempted to finish updating the second book I wrote to be published on Kindle or finalize the third. The reason why is not because I have been so preoccupied with other things that I can't get to them. It's not because I don't know what I need to do. It's not even because I don't want to. It is mainly because I feel like I have lost my voice.

Things with Jordan are the same. He is still on a modified version of the Nemechek protocol. The olive oil affects him to where he does not sleep well at night, like he has had food that has inflamed his gut or his body thinks is foreign. His dosage of inulin and fish oil has increased just a little. Today I see the results of his cheat day at the cookout he went to at his teacher's house for one of his classmate's graduation. He was up early this morning, and his stimming is severe, even though not often. I hate to see these things but hate to keep him from partaking in things he enjoys because of his broken system that I can't seem to get in working order. Hopefully, this won't last too long.

There have been no changes with Jordan and really no big achievements that have been made aside from him spending time with his older sister instead of being cooped up in his room, not wanting to interact with anyone. We have determined we think it is because he wants to eat her cereal when she steps out of the room for some time. I generally think he does want to play some of the games on the Wii system because that's where his love for video games started, but now I believe the two go hand in hand. Next week will be the end of his 11th-grade year, although that is really not his grade. His level is 11C1. I have no clue what that is. I just know that he will be in high school until he is 21. He will be 17 next month. I really believed that he would be graduating next year because of all I was working to do to get his gastrointestinal system in working order so his brain could operate the way it should to retain information and get on his correct grade level. I think that is why part of me does not concern myself with the school aspect of him. Most times, I feel like I have failed at what I was so sure would come to pass because of God's word and my belief in Mark 9:29. 

The thing is, this verse says, "So He said to them, “This kind can come out by nothing but prayer and fasting.” Who has been fasting? Not I. Over the past few years, I have seen just how much information I have gained regarding Jordan and what helps him by fasting. I found the Feingold diet when fasting. That helped Jordan with his behaviors, but he was limited in what he could eat, so malnourishment could become an issue. Another one was Dr. Sebi's alkaline vegan diet that helped somewhat. Still, he could not continue because many of the vegetables that were approved to eat were possibly causing inflammation in his intestines because of their natural ingredients and him having a leaky gut. I also found that out during a fast. For the life of me, I can not find what helps resolve a leaking gut. I know you have to stay away from inflammatory foods, which for the most part, we do, but also to get the bacteria overgrowth under control if SIBO is still a problem. It appears that maybe it is time to do another fast because, as it stands, I really don't know what the problem is with him anymore. 

I do know is he has been free of tinea versicolor for a decent amount of time, so I am not sure if bacteria overgrowth is still an issue. I do see slight improvements in his stimming when taking the inulin because of its ability to slow digestion so you can better absorb nutrients and boosts gut health. I continue with this protocol above all the others we had tried because of the advancements I saw on our first trial when he learned how to ride a bike. But, I feel like our next steps should be some sort of testing. Dr. Nemechek has been working on the second edition of his book that is twice the size of the first and has different testing and results within it. The only issue is, this protocol is life-long. He has no idea what to do to correct the issues faced and keep it that way. Maybe that is for me to figure out?

Today I started this blog post with no idea what I would say because I felt I lost my voice. However, as I started typing, the words started to flow. So as it seems, I have not lost my voice; I just have to attempt to speak, and the words will come to me. Today I learned I still have something to say AND my next course of action.